I Am a Human

I am a human.

I am insecure.

I need you to constantly tell me that I am a great person for me to feel good about myself.

I am paranoid.

If I get 30 likes instead of 34 likes on my Instagram, I'll wonder what I did wrong and why no one loves me.

I am deluded.

I think that everyone is constantly talking and thinking about me... when in reality, everyone only thinks about me as much, if not less, than I think about them.

I am selfish.

I wonder sometimes why I don't have a best friend who I do everything with and talk to about everything... and I think it's because no one loves me... when in fact, I have many amazing friends.

I am a liar.

If the truth inconveniences me, I will cover it up and pretend it never happened just to make myself sound better.

I am human.

Today was one of those days where I sat  down on my bed and thought about how horrible of a person I am.

But...

I am forgiven.

Today was also one of those days where I realized that God knows all the things I've done, including the things I have not written here.
He knows all of the crimes I've committed... And yet still... He chooses to forgive me.

He sent Jesus Christ to be nailed to a crude mount of splintered wood.

He sent HIS ONLY SON to take upon Himself the weight of the sin of every single disgusting human and to put those sins behind us.

He chose to forgive us.

He chose to forgive ME.

All those things I listed before... God knows about them and He says that they don't matter.
I'm His child and He is ready to forgive me just as soon as I am willing to let go of those sins.

Romans 10:9-10
"...because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved."

I am content.

Since I have Jesus in my heart, I don't have to face my trials alone. I will always have God... not by my side, but as my guide and leader. I never have to be afraid.

I am saved.